Points mean prizes.
I have not done one for a while so here you go.

Q1. How many spam emails did I receive while I was on holiday.
Q2. How many were offering me Rolex watches.

Points
400 each to the person with that gets closest to the right answer.

- posted by J @ 22:43

 
phew!
What a week.

It has been production week here in theatre land for our wonderful Christmas show Alice in wonderland.
And what a week it has been, we had a flutter box (basically a giant music box made from junk and costing 900 quid for the run) that got cut yesterday, We have a house front (the duchess's house) that flys in and falls over ( that crushed two Birdies and two mic's during the second dress), a video sync (the actor talks and the projected image talks back) that doesn't work, a heavy fogger that has packed up and all in all a show that is probably best viewed while on acid.

Oh and I have done 85 hours this week and poppy has a nasty cold. Again.

So as you can see I have had very little time to post this week but I am now back up and running and trying to catch up with the vast quantity of stuff you lot seem to post when I'm away.

Other news:
Mr Wiggles is about to start the first part of his holiday and is off to see Kelly in the USA, you will be able to track his movement's as soon as I get the page up and running.
Happy thanksgiving to all over there, I'm not sure what the holiday is about (seems like an excuse to have 2 christmas's to me) but I hope you all enjoyed it.
Vic and I are putting the final touches to our Christmas cards and they will be coming out soon.
other than that it has been a rather dull couple of weeks.

Will post soon.

J

- posted by J @ 22:04

 
Tech corner part 2
Here is part number 2.

5) Take the short piece of wire you cut earlier and cut through the outer casing so you end up with the individual cores. Strip each end as before.
Fig 4

You should end up with fig 4.

6) Take the brown/red (Live) wire and cut it in half, Strip both the cut ends as before and put one half to one side.
7) Use these wires to wire up the second bulb holder as per step 4 (obviously the brown/red (live) will be shorter).

This gives you your second part of your Diagram.

8)Take you starter holder as below.

And wire into the left wire point the brown/red (Live) wire from the bulb holder you just wired and into the right wire point wire the short piece of brown/red (live) wire you cut off in step 6.
It should end up looking like this.

This will now give you the third part of your circuit diagram below.


Part 3 to follow.

- posted by J @ 23:40

 
Tech support extreme.
Received via email:

Dear Technical Support,

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9.
Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.

I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks.
Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.

I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0.
While Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2004.

Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them.
Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary,Explorer and E-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Whinge. These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is.
Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Saab 93 Convertable hard drive, it often crashes.

Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which can't be turned off. Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2003, but there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2003, it tends to delete all of your Money before uninstalling itself.

Help requested please?

- posted by J @ 23:39

 
Hols.
Ahhh a little time to talk about my hol.
It was a fantastic restbyte from the world.
Vic and I hired a lovely little cottage in the middle of nowhere in Devon. The cottage had all modcons Inc. dishwasher and sky TV and a very lovely situation halfway up the side of a valley.
We spent Sunday settling in and on Monday went for a wander into Totnes for the day which is a very hippie town full of new age shops. Tuesday was spent in kingsbridge and Salcombe looking at shops, Rivers, Beaches and food. Wednesday was spent lazing around doing nothing, but Thursday was Dartmoor day which is a place I love, after a drive through Buckfastleigh and a couple of small villages we were up on the moor and it was as stunning as ever, After a quick pootle through Princetown (There is bugger all there except Dartmoor prison, very imposing) we had a lovely cuppa at the Two bridges it was on to the badgers holt for lunch by the river then the long way back to the cottage. Friday we went off to Dartmouth for wandering and to buy lunch then along the coast to Slapton sands watching the sea (poppy's first real view) much fun was had chucking stones.
Saturday was another lazy one before returning home on Sunday.

Well that's my holiday in a nutshell, It was very relaxing and stressless just what we all needed before the madness of Christmas and my schedule. I will post some photos when I get a chance.

Later's.

- posted by J @ 17:26

 
More congratulations!
To Markiss again who has solved the hidden word, he has got all the prizes and given me the message so has earned his first plaque on my BLOGS OF LEGEND section.

Well done matey.

Also well done Edmund 20 points it was Monty python holy grail.

- posted by J @ 19:29

 
Congrats!
First of all I am back from my hol and I will tell you all about it soon.

Secondly Congrats to Markiss who has just acquired the last two soil prizes he needed to give him the full message (I hope to hear from you soon) and gain his bronze plaque.

Check ya's

J

- posted by J @ 21:49

 
Run away, Run away!
I'm on holiday for a week as of tomorrow so you will all have to entertain yourselves for a bit.
don't do anything I wouldn't do and enjoy the silence.

20 Points to the first person who knows which film the line I have used for a title came from.

- posted by J @ 18:48

 
Tech corner Part 1
After a rash of "How to" stuff on various bloggers I thought I would impart some of my wisdom.
This Tech corner will appear in 4 parts so I would print it off if I was you (You should do anyway if you want to follow the instructions).

So here is how to make a Fire effect / TV flicker for the theatre.

NOTE: Before you go any further everything you read here is based on the UK 240 volt system using UK Products. Before you undertake any electrical work make sure you know what you are doing and that you have the proper equipment if possible consult a qualified electrician.
I hold no responsibility for you zapping yourselves.

You will need:
2 BC (Bayonet) Batten Lamp holders.
2 60W BC Bulbs.
1 Fluorescent tube starter.
1 Fluorescent tube starter holder.
1 Piece of choc block.
2ft piece of 3-core wire
1 long Piece of 3 core (your flex)
1 13A plug (Based on the UK).

1) Cut off about 6 inches of your 2ft of cable and put to one side (you will need it later)
Fig1. Fig 2.
2) Strip the wire as show above (Live/Brown or Red, Neutral/Blue or black, Earth/yellow and green) and bend the exposed cores in half (see fig 2)

3) Repeat step two at the other end of your piece of cable.

Fig 3.
4) Most bulb holders are as fig 3 they have 3 points a Live, Neutral and an earth, some however do not have an earth, no problem simply cut off the earth wire or use 2 core wire.
Wire up the holder.


This gives you the first part of your circuit diagram.

Part 2 will follow soon.

- posted by J @ 17:51

 
To cheese or not to cheese
Have not done one for a while so...

Here we go with the Dead Cheddar X!

1. What would you write on your epitaph?
It's fucking dark in here.

2. What would you like to be remembered for?
Being a loving, honest and generous person.

3. What would the title of your memoirs be?
"don't ask me I don't have a clue"

4. Who would you like to play you in the movie of your life? Who should play you?
Simon pegg
Nick frost

5. If you had one moment to do over, to either change the outcome or savor the moment again, which moment would it be?
None But if pushed the birth of my daughter to savor it.

- posted by J @ 17:08

 
Strange things afoot.
When I got to work today I went down to switch the emergency lights on and as I walked around the corner I was confronted by a 5ft by 4ft cauldron, a giant mushroom and 5 pink flamingo umbrellas, It scared the shit out of me.

Oh and the ponds on stage are leaking again.

- posted by J @ 23:31

 
Burning bush.
I don't like political blogs or really getting involved in them as it seems very easy to upset people if they think you have a different opinion to them. But it has to be said.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON.

Has everyone in the US been watching a different channel to the rest of the world (apart from a few I know of). The guy is madder than a box of badgers, Europe in it's entirety seems to hate him Including the UK (I'm talking about real people here not ass kissing Politicians), Afghanistan was a white wash, Osama bin laden still has not been found and Afghanistan is in complete turmoil (the oil is flowing ok though), Iraq is turning into another Vietnam (apart from the oil contracts that seem to be moving along nicely) and the news I get from friends in the states is that he has done very little there either and is using "The war against terrorism" to push through his more unfavorable bills and you want him for 4 more years.

Ok! Well you signed up for it.

Note: Before I get my comments box besieged by wailing ignoramus telling me I don't know what I'm talking about and that bush is the best president you ever had, I would just like to say:

I DON'T CARE THIS IS MY OPINION AND I AM HAPPY WITH IT.

If you would like to take the time to construct a well thought out argument I'm all ways ready to listen to other points of view and to take on board other peoples opinions.
I would also like to add that if I offend anybody I am sorry but this is the way I and many others feel because unfortunately politics in the US does effect us and the rest of the world.

To everyone else.

Rant over.

- posted by J @ 17:30

 
Sound of music re-run.
Due to kelvin not reading my blog this is just for him the sound of music post can be found here

I am not offering any more points but it can be done for fun.

Enjoy.

- posted by J @ 17:10

 
You know it is a slow news day when...
What type of ciggies Kate winslett smokes appears as a nearly full page story.

- posted by J @ 23:48

 
Sound of music final
My final five.

Waking up: Woke up this morning by Alabama 3.
House work: Jump around by house of pain.
Getting into bed: come away with me by Nora Jones.
Normal bus ride home: Nevermind by nirvana.
And
A visit by mother: Symphony of distraction by Megadeath.

Here are Kel's:

Opening credits: Brass in Pocket by the Pretenders
Morning coffee: What a Wonderful World cliche but I don't care
Singing in Shower: Jump in the Line by Harry Belafonte
Cleaning the house: Weapon of Choice by Fatboy Slim
Relaxing in favorite chair: And She Was by Talking Heads
Driving into town: Beverly Hillbilllies Theme song
Shopping: The Chicken Dance
A Visit with the Mother: I Used to Love Her by GNR
Aaaaahhh.... The Sex Scene: Rhapsody in Blue, Gershwin. And why not?
Getting ready for bed: Der Moldau by Smetanaand
I KNOW this is 11 but for the closing credits: Forever in Blue Jeans by Neil Diamond

And Markiss's:

Waking up: Living in Paradise (Dave Lee Roth)
Driving to work: Up & Around the bend (Hanoi Rocks)
Working "am": Sweet Emotion (Aerosmith)
Working"pm": Easy Livin' (Uriah Heep)
Driving Home: Doctor Doctor (UFO)
Getting ready to go out: Still of the night (Whitesnake)
When out: 2 minutes to midnight (Iron Maiden)
Going home: Lady Starlight (Scorpions)
Once home: My only love (Roxy music)
The morning after: Tears ( Rush)

For your sterling efforts I am giving you both 500 points each and a prezzie.

Well done

- posted by J @ 23:31